MOXIE - The Ironic Fate of Rockland Hall

My last day on Earth sucked. Like, catastrophically bad. My cat attacked me, my boss fired me, someone hit my car and left me a $20 bill with the word "Sorry" on it. And that ain't even the half of it. Suffice to say, it was a rough one. By the end of it, I was so frazzled that I got into a screaming match with a construction worker and said something that I probably shouldn't have. After a day like that, maybe I could have been forgiven for yelling the crudest, stupidest insult I could think of at the guy...but Construction Guy turned out to be The System. And The System ain't the forgiving type.  So, I said the dumbest thing of all time to the absolute worst possible person I could have said it to, then immediately died in what I can only describe as an incredibly suspicious and embarrassing manner. Then I woke up in a fantasy world governed by that self-same System, who happens to talk like an old mob boss and holds grudges like one, too. My class? Infiltrator. My hidden subclass? Built entirely around those five stupid words I screamed on the worst day of my life.  Now I gotta find a way to survive in a world full of monsters, gods, aliens, and faction politics. All while navigating a devastating hangnail condition. I do have Moxie as my hidden stat, but it does nothing to keep me from writing checks I'm unequipped to cash. Life here does have its bright sides, though, if I'm being honest. I've met a lot of super cool people in this world, turned some enemies into friends, accidentally married an 8 foot tall orc, and met a real life god. All thanks to being a big dummy dumdum who consistently mouths off to the wrong people. There is one guy who wants me dead, but you know...that's life. I just wish he wasn't so much higher level than me. And better looking. Stupid sexy orc.  Anyway, if you're looking for a story about turning enemies into allies, overcoming the odds through sheer determination and grit, with maybe a dash of comedic relief and the occasional MILF, then this is the story for you! If you're looking for an MC who is usually out of his depth and has to think his way through most fights rather than brute forcing them, then even better! I'm your guy!. MOXIE: For everyone who's ever said something ridiculous and had to live with the consequences. Content warning: Blood, cursing, nudity, and sexual content (not explicit, but present). The tags are accurate. Posting Schedule: M-F