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The 5,000 Year-Old Babysitter

The 5,000 Year-Old Babysitter

by Marcus Black

Urban FantasyStrategyComedyMale LeadSci-fi

"I warned the Romans about their aqueducts. They called me a madman. They flooded. I warned the Mesopotamians about their grain. They called me a fool. They starved." John has been alive for five millennia. He isn't a hero, a villain, or a god. He’s just the only one in the room who knows how the math works. After five thousand years of being thrown out of the best rooms in history, John finally finds a generation that will listen: The 1940s. From fixing the Manhattan Project to building a sarcastic AI that runs the modern internet, John is the hidden hand behind the 20th century. He doesn't want your worship. He doesn't want your money (he already has most of it). He just wants a decent pastrami sandwich and for you to stop being so incredibly stupid. A story of high-competence, historical irony, and a very sarcastic digital babysitter.

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Followers
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Story Timeline

Started

1w ago

10

6d ago

20

3d ago

OverviewEngagementProseChapters
Favorites
6
+6
FVR
4.63%
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Ratings
2
+2
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RS Days
0
Total Chapters
4
Total Words
0
Avg Length
0
Analyzed
0
Chapter Analysis
Word counts and prose metrics for each chapter
#TitleWordsFK GradeDialogueSSPVariation
0Five Thousand Years of 'Get Out'0----
1Los Alamos and the Miracle of Basic Listening0----
2Pattern Recognition (They’re Actually Learning, Holy Shit)0----
3Let’s Make This Official (AKA The Government Admits Defeat)0----