
by EmilyGolus
Adventure calls. The wrong party answers. Quirky royal Mira Olvidneth is her underground city’s Very Worst Engineer and its Most Despised Bachelorette—all before her nineteenth birthday. When a goblin friend falls ill and the only cure can be found by the sea, Mira is willing to journey across Vindor’s vast forests to get it—even though she’s never spent a day in the above-ground world. What could go wrong? To help her, Mira’s cousin sets her up with an adventuring party that’s “the best of the best,” including a centaur warrior, a samurai blademaster, a potion-making magician, and a world-famous navigator. But as the party ventures into the wilderness, Mira discovers everything she’s been told about her companions is a lie. Which is … not particularly ideal, especially as the hopeless party bumbles into the clutches of Vindor’s most ruthless warlord. What to expect: 🙃 Character-driven, situational comedy 🎭 Funny characters, serious stakes 🗺️ Robust fantasy world-building 🎲 TTRPG tropes and humor without stats or technical details 😇 No graphic content 🦄 Fantastical creatures 🐓 Danger chicken Moving to Kindle Unlimited -- download the ebook free on October 1, 2026!
| # | Title | Words |
|---|---|---|
| 0 | 1: Doom and other annoyances | 0 |
| 1 | 2: You may be despised, but are you the despised-est? | 0 |
| 2 | 3: If you can’t trust your cousin, who can you trust? | 0 |
| 3 | 4: Party time | 0 |
| 4 | 5: In which no one earns a camping award | 0 |
| 5 | 6: Into the drink | 0 |
| 6 | 7: Beware of egg | 0 |
| 7 | 8: So yeah, everything is a lie | 0 |
| 8 | 9: It’s not like, awkward or anything | 0 |
| 9 | 10: Are birds bringing YOU treasure? I thought not | 0 |
| 10 | 11: Many hats but not enough cats | 0 |
| 11 | 12: But we'll get all wet | 0 |
| 12 | 13: Nope, nothing weird or embarrassing | 0 |
| 13 | 14: Honestly, we should have seen this coming | 0 |
| 14 | 15: Hhgwynnefar | 0 |
| 15 | 16: I can’t believe I ate the whole thing | 0 |
| 16 | 17: Mother of all boops | 0 |
| 17 | 18: In Barry and Larry we trust, I guess | 0 |
| 18 | 19: Ravensblood | 0 |
| 19 | 20: Wow, that escalated | 0 |
| 20 | 21: Bless you, Lartimus | 0 |
| 21 | 22: A time to dye | 0 |
| 22 | 23: Perhaps we should panic | 0 |
| 23 | 24: This is what heroes look like. Right? | 0 |
| 24 | 25: Should have seen this coming | 0 |
| 25 | 26: On a scale of one to bad, this is really, really bad | 0 |
| 26 | 27: Smooth sailing | 0 |
| 27 | 28: Sally forth! | 0 |
| 28 | 29: Thanks, I hate it | 0 |
| 29 | 30: An unfortunate boop | 0 |
| 30 | 31: Yay for … treasure(?) | 0 |
| 31 | 32: Just, you know, perfectly normal bird stuff | 0 |
| 32 | 33: Queen of crows | 0 |
| 33 | 34: Written in the stars | 0 |
| 34 | 35: In which we somehow don’t get stomppled | 0 |
| 35 | 36: Isn’t that just the way? | 0 |
| 36 | 37: I’m bringing doom back, baby | 0 |
| 37 | 38: Destroying our civilization (but it’s fun) | 0 |
| 38 | Epilogue | 0 |