
by Ms.SnavelyWrites
[Urban Fantasy] [Cozy Horror] [Dark Humor] [Female Lead] [No Romance! Just Pure Chaos] [Graphic] [Light body horror-Scenes vary] Welcome to Sharpe's Antique and Oddities, where the retail is boring, but the customers are anything but. Tegan thought she was managing just fine with possessed dolls, feral dust bunnies, and customers who'd sell your soul for a good coupon. That is, until a man-eating feral dog starts terrorizing the town and a deadly supernatural conspiracy unfolds. Certain she's next when a dark entity attaches itself right to her that no amount of hexed jewelry can shake. The only one who can get rid of it is a reaper, and he’s not exactly in a position to help. He’ll do it once he sobers up. But for a price. (Fucking typical) He sets her to find the souls of the dead girls he lost, or she has to live with what’s hunting her. And let's not forget, she still needs to clock in for her shift.Obey all Rules! 1. Wear protective gear when entering the basement. 2. Do not look anything in the eyes that has a face. (You will be haunted) 3. Always keep an eye on Joseph! (Rule two does not apply to Joseph!) 4. Do not talk back or insult the customers. Especially the witches. Enjoy the ride. Please keep your hands and feet inside at all times, and don't forget long socks. (The dust bunnies bite.)
| # | Title | Words |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Chapter 1: Rule One- Don't fucking touch anything | 0 |
| 2 | Chapter 3: Nope! Not Today, Satan! | 0 |
| 3 | Chapter 4: Morgan Llocsird Can Go to Hell | 0 |
| 4 | Chapter 12: Annoying Customers and Why I Deserve Hazard Pay | 0 |
| 5 | Chapter 13: The fried food didn't kill her, but this fucking dog might. | 0 |
| 6 | Chapter 14: Wait, How the fuck did i end up here? | 0 |
| 7 | Chapter 2: A Perfectly Nice Croissant Ruined by Lycan Propaganda and a Workplace Crush | 0 |
| 8 | Chapter 5: One Narwhal please, Hold the Trauma | 0 |
| 9 | Chapter 6: I said hold the fucking trauma! | 0 |
| 10 | Chapter 7: "I rebuke you Satan!" | 0 |
| 11 | Chapter 8-The Dog Wasn't Rabid, I swear! It Was Just Built Different | 0 |
| 12 | Chapter 9- Hemlock and Why This Is a Terrible Idea... | 0 |
| 13 | Chapter 10-Great, Now I Need a Restraining Order Against a Fucking Shadow | 0 |
| 14 | Chapter 15.- Can Everyone Stop Ruining My Morning? Like Damn. | 0 |
| 15 | Chapter 16-Apparently Financial Crimes Are a Love Language. (I am looking right at you lottie) | 0 |
| 16 | Chapter 17- Hafgufa My Ass | 0 |
| 17 | Chapter 18- I'd bite you too (I thought Ethan was the Dumbass in the family) | 0 |
| 18 | Chapter 19- Wait! So, Lunch Is Cursed and Holden isn't the Mafia? | 0 |
| 19 | Chapter 20- A picky bitch and A drama queen | 0 |
| 20 | Chapter 21: “American Vampires Are Dignified,” My Ass | 0 |
| 21 | Chapter 22-Vampires are apparently very anti-kink shaming ghosts, who the fuck knew | 0 |
| 22 | Chapter 23- Interrogations and Honey: The Worst Case of Good Cop, Bad Cop | 0 |
| 23 | Chapter 24- Remmi Vs the Sky Demon. Act 1 (I need popcorn for this shit) | 0 |
| 24 | Chapter 25- This smells Like Bullshit. (Rotting Ectoplasm was not in the training manual) | 0 |
| 25 | Chapter 26- The Delicate Art of Adopting a Cryptid (it grabs you and you're its mother, congrats) | 0 |
| 26 | Chapter 27: One Cockroach and a Charitable cause (but one is a lie.) | 0 |
| 27 | Chapter 28- Tag you're in- No Takebacks | 0 |
| 28 | Chapter 29- No Time To Dawdle, Dear (Am I supposed to ignore the murder tree?) | 0 |
| 29 | Chapter 30- Definitely Not Fae | 0 |
| 30 | Chapter 31- It wasn't me, okay it was but i was high on Hobgoblin venom. | 0 |
| 31 | Chapter 32-Violated. That's It. That's the Chapter (I don't care it saved my life) | 0 |
| 32 | Chapter 33-Quick history lesson- Witches are unhygienic and spew ungodly body fluids | 0 |
| 33 | Chapter 34- Try and censor me and see what happens | 0 |
| 34 | Chapter 35- It touched my grey matter and rooted through it like a damn truffle pig | 0 |
| 35 | Chapter 36- We are all going to Hell Together | 0 |
| 36 | Chapter 37-Mordecai and his Very Punchable face. | 0 |
| 37 | Chapter 38- A Baku walked into a Bar...and Other bad jokes | 0 |
| 38 | Chapter 39- I won't answer the phone and you can't fucking make me. | 0 |
| 39 | Chapter 11- Well, That backfired. | — |
| 40 | Bonus Chapter- AFTERHOURS- Joseph get off that Thing! you don't know where it's been | 0 |
| 41 | BONUS CHAPTER- AFTER HOURS- Joseph Always lies1 Except for this time apparently | 0 |
| 42 | Chapter 40-Squonks deserves justice, so does Lizzy. | 0 |
| 43 | Chapter 41-yes, i bailed on my job and bullied a damn dog. (We all know i have issues) | 0 |
| 44 | Chapter 42- Remmi is rocking that 80's hooker look. (Lotties is getting a dry-cleaning bill) | 0 |
| 45 | Chapter 43- There's a soul sucking monster at the funeral...oh Mordecai is here too. | 0 |
| 46 | Chapter 45- This Bitch just pulled a Quokka (this is why i hate public Transportation) | 0 |
| 47 | Chapter 46-Dead man walking. (I am not above committing violent crimes today) | 0 |
| 48 | Chapter 47- Assholes and Broken Vows (I'm looking at you Holden!) | 0 |
| 49 | Chapter 48- Who put Death in the freezer? | 0 |
| 50 | Chapter 49- Popcorn, A show and Violated Corpse! (Leave the poor dead guy alone Ferdinand!) | 0 |
| 51 | Chapter 50- One Washed blanket (how dare Lottie) and very angry kobold noises. | 0 |
| 52 | Chapter 44- Nobody Panic. (Why is everyone panicking?) | 0 |
| 53 | Chapter 51- A Book with Teeth (and a Boss with None) | 0 |
| 54 | Chapter 52- Put the Damn Frog Down (and Other Monday shenanigans.) | 0 |
| 55 | Chapter 53- This asshole and his Stuffed animals (They are not adequate peace offerings!) | 0 |
| 56 | Chapter 54-Now we got A body count and Magical puberty. | 0 |
| 57 | Chapter 55- The Butterfly Effect from Hell and a Human Juicebox | 0 |
| 58 | Chapter 57- A Teddy Bear, a Break-In, and My Boss Having a Breakdown | 0 |
| 59 | Chapter 56: The Murder bug with an Identity crisis that followed me home. | 0 |
| 60 | Chapter 58- A sea lizard left her baby with me and ran away (Rude, but i get it) | — |
| 61 | Chapter 59- The Flamethrower seemed like overkill | — |
| 62 | Chapter 60- Never, Ever Give clothes to a pixie | — |
| 63 | Chapter 61- Shark week, but with Gnomes | — |
| 64 | Chapter 62- The Sheer Structural Disrespect of It All | — |
| 65 | Chapter 63- Bad Dog | — |
| 66 | Chapter 64-New Book, New place, Who dis? | — |
| 67 | Chapter 2: Death Gods and Vampire Dentures? (I need A Raise) | 0 |
| 68 | Chapter 47- Broken thumbs, Broken watches and more black ooze... Fuck! | 0 |
| 69 | Chapter 51- Why the hell would someone fire blast a ghost? | 0 |
| 70 | Chapter 53- Who would win? The boyfriend or the coffee t (My money's on the coffee table) | 0 |
| 71 | Chapter 16-Ichigo Manako can go to Hell (She does not pass go! She does not collect 200) 4 months ago | 0 |
| 72 | Quick Upate 1 month ago | 0 |