
by Ms.SnavelyWrites
[Urban Fantasy] [Cozy Horror] [Dark Humor] [Female Lead] [No Romance! Just Pure Chaos] Welcome to Sharpe's Antique and Oddities, where the retail is boring but the customer are anything but. Tegan thought she was managing just fine with possessed dolls, feral dust bunnies, and customers who'd sell your soul for a good coupon. That is, until a man-eating feral dog starts terrorizing the town and local girls turn up dead. Certain she's next when a dark entity attaches itself right to her that no amount of hexed jewelry can shake. The only one who can get rid of it is a reaper, and he’s not exactly in a position to help. He’ll do it once he sobers up. But for a price. (Fucking typical) He sets her to find the souls of the dead girls he lost, or she has to live with what’s hunting her. And let's not forget, she still needs to clock in for her shift.Obey all Rules! 1. Wear protective gear when entering the basement. 2. Do not look anything in the eyes that has a face. (you will be haunted) 3. Always keep an eye on Joseph! (Rule two does not apply to Joseph!) 4. Do not talk back or insult the customers. Especially the witches. Enjoy the ride. Please keep your hands and feet inside at all times, and don't forget long socks. (The dust bunnies bite.)
| # | Title | Words |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Chapter 1: Rule One- Don't fucking touch anything 4 months ago | 0 |
| 2 | Chapter 2: Death Gods and Vampire Dentures? (I need A Raise) 4 months ago | 0 |
| 3 | Chapter 3: Nope! Not Today, Satan! 4 months ago | 0 |
| 4 | Chapter 4: Morgan Llocsird Can Go to Hell 4 months ago | 0 |
| 5 | Chapter 5: Annoying Customers and Why I Deserve Hazard Pay 4 months ago |
| 0 |
| 6 | Chapter 6: The fried food didn't kill her, but this fucking dog might. 4 months ago | 0 |
| 7 | Chapter 7: Wait, How the fuck did i end up here? 4 months ago | 0 |
| 8 | Chapter 8: Who ordered a bitch fit and a shadow with no boundaries. (I sure as shit didn't) 4 months ago | 0 |
| 9 | Chapter 9: One Narwhal please, Hold the Trauma 4 months ago | 0 |
| 10 | Chapter 10: I said hold the fucking trauma! 4 months ago | 0 |
| 11 | Chapter 11: "I rebuke you Satan!" 4 months ago | 0 |
| 12 | Chapter 12-Inky things and broken rings? I think i'm in trouble 4 months ago | 0 |
| 13 | Chapter 13- Hemlock and Why This Is a Terrible Idea... 4 months ago | 0 |
| 14 | Chapter 14-Great, Now I Need a Restraining Order Against a Fucking Shadow 4 months ago | 0 |
| 15 | Chapter 15.- Can Everyone Stop Ruining My Morning? Like Damn. 4 months ago | 0 |
| 16 | Chapter 16-Ichigo Manako can go to Hell (She does not pass go! She does not collect 200) 4 months ago | 0 |
| 17 | Chapter 17-Apparently Financial Crimes Are a Love Language. (I am looking right at you lottie) 4 months ago | 0 |
| 18 | Chapter 18- I am not above fighting this puddle (Or Ethan for a matter of fact) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 19 | Chapter 19- I'd bite you too (I thought Ethan was the Dumbass in the family) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 20 | Chapter 20-Drama, bird shit and emotional support sandwiches. (I hate Tuesdays) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 21 | Chapter 21- A picky bitch and A drama queen 3 months ago | 0 |
| 22 | Chapter 22: “American Vampires Are Dignified,” My Ass 3 months ago | 0 |
| 23 | Chapter 23-Vampires are apparently very anti-kink shaming ghosts, who the fuck knew 3 months ago | 0 |
| 24 | Chapter 24- Interrogations and Honey: The Worst Case of Good Cop, Bad Cop 3 months ago | 0 |
| 25 | Chapter 25- Remmi Vs the Sky Demon. Act 1 (I need popcorn for this shit) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 26 | Chapter 26- This smells Like Bullshit. (Rotting Ectoplasm was not in the training manual) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 27 | Chapter 27- Well, That's his blanket now 3 months ago | 0 |
| 28 | Chapter 28: One Cockroach and a Charitable cause (but one is a lie.) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 29 | Chapter 29- Tag you're in- No Takebacks 3 months ago | 0 |
| 30 | Chapter 30- No Time To Dawdle, Dear (Am I supposed to ignore the murder tree?) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 31 | Chapter 31- Definitely Not Fae 3 months ago | 0 |
| 32 | Chapter 32- It wasn't me, okay it was but i was high on Hobgoblin venom. 3 months ago | 0 |
| 33 | Chapter 33-Violated. That's It. That's the Chapter (I don't care it saved my life) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 34 | Chapter 34-Quick history lesson- Witches are unhygienic and spew ungodly body fluids 3 months ago | 0 |
| 35 | Chapter 35- Try and censor me and see what happens 3 months ago | 0 |
| 36 | Chapter 36- It touched my g matter and rooted through it like a damn truffle pig (I'm not fine!) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 37 | ChaPter 37- We are all going to Hell Together 3 months ago | 0 |
| 38 | Chapter 38-Mordecai and his Very Punchable face. 3 months ago | 0 |
| 39 | Chapter 39- A Baku walked into a Bar...and Other bad jokes 3 months ago | 0 |
| 40 | Chapter 40- I won't answer the phone and you can't fucking make me. 3 months ago | 0 |
| 41 | Bonus Chapter- AFTERHOURS- Joseph get off that Thing! you don't know where it's been 3 months ago | 0 |
| 42 | BONUS CHAPTER- AFTER HOURS- Joseph Always lies1 Except for this time apparently 3 months ago | 0 |
| 43 | Chapter 41- Two Lines and Maybe a Felony Charge (I said maybe dammit) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 44 | Chapter 42-yes, i bailed on my job and bullied a damn dog. (We all know i have issues) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 45 | Chapter 43- Remmi is rocking that 80's hooker look. (Lotties is getting a dry-cleaning bill) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 46 | Chapter 44 — There's a soul sucking monster at the funeral...oh Mordecai is here too. 3 months ago | 0 |
| 47 | Chapter 46- This Bitch just pulled a Quokka (this is why i hate public Transportation) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 48 | Chapter 47- Leobwin is a dead man walking (I am not above committing violent crimes today) 3 months ago | 0 |
| 49 | Chapter 48- Broken thumbs, Broken watches and more black ooze... Fuck! 2 months ago | 0 |
| 50 | Chapter 49- Assholes and Broken Vows (I'm looking at you Holden!) 2 months ago | 0 |
| 51 | Chapter 50- Who put Death in the freezer? 2 months ago | 0 |
| 52 | Chapter 51- Popcorn, A show and Violated Corpse! (Leave the poor dead guy alone Ferdinand!) 2 months ago | 0 |
| 53 | Chapter 52- Why the hell would someone fire blast a ghost? 2 months ago | 0 |
| 54 | Chapter 53- One Washed blanket (how dare Lottie) and very angry kobold noises. 1 month ago | 0 |
| 55 | Chapter 54- Who would win? The boyfriend or the coffee t (My money's on the coffee table) 1 month ago | 0 |
| 56 | Chapter 45- Nobody Panic! (Everyone Fucking Panics anyway) 1 month ago | 0 |
| 57 | Chapter 55- How soon is too soon to ask for a raise (asking for a friend... No, No i am not) 1 month ago | 0 |
| 58 | Chapter 56- Put the Damn Frog Down (and Other Monday shenanigans.) 23 days ago | 0 |
| 59 | Chapter 57- This asshole and his Stuffed animals (They are not adequate peace offerings!) 17 days ago | 0 |
| 60 | Chapter 58- Ringing the Dinner bell (Featuring one whiney bitch in my back seat) 10 days ago | 0 |
| 61 | Chapter 59- Oh, it's the likes the butterfly effect...from hell. 6 days ago | 0 |
| 62 | Chapter 60- I refused to be treated like a Juicebox! (Keep those fangs to yourself!) 6 minutes ago | 0 |
| 63 | Quick Upate 1 month ago | 0 |