Geezer's Quest [Party-based LitRPG]

An old man, a lawyer, and a stripper walk into an XP bar... When aliens from another dimension turn Earth into their fantasy playground, Buck DiGriz survives against all odds. In the process he becomes the old reliable of heroes - Human Fighter. With no guide or tutorial, he'll need to rely on his many decades of life and RPG experience to go from a cranky nuisance to a full-blown disaster for the invaders. A quest like this requires trusty allies. The ones Buck finds are a Southern lawyer with a hair trigger and a stripper whose explosive personality is only rivaled by her fire spells. The three of them will have to learn to work together as they explore a strange land packed with monsters of legend, undead hordes, cozy towns with seedy underbellies, and arrogant wizards carelessly poking at arcane fabrics. All the while they'll be hunted by alien agents not looking to have their fun spoiled by the few surviving locals. What to Expect• Dynamic fantasy adventure inspired by Sword & Sorcery stories of the pulp era• Rich RPG system taking its cues from D&D, Might and Magic, Arcanum, and Fallout - hidden trainers, paid skill promotions, and perks galore• Gradual progression where every level is a milestone - book one covers levels 0-7• Single first-person PoV and no flashbacks - the story ever moves forward• Lighthearted tone but real stakes - the situations the heroes find themselves in may often be comedic, but the danger is always real• (Im)mature characters who know what they're about - no teen angst or drama due to miscommunication• Babes in varying states of undress but no smut or harems Book 1 (130,000 words) is finished and scheduled for release. Book 2, Geezer's Side Quest, is currently being written.Release schedule: New chapters on Monday, Wednesday, Friday.No robots were used in the writing of this story. Punchlines ...The bartender gives them all swords and goes, "It's dangerous to go alone. Take these."...The bartender pulls out a sword from behind the counter and looks at the old man. "Shouldn't you be the one giving these out?"...The bartender looks at them and goes, "Guess I know who handles the grinding on your team."...The bartender looks at them and goes, "Guess they were right. Lawyers would survive the apocalypse."...The old man adjusts his collar and goes, "I tell ya, I get no respec."