](/_next/image?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.royalroadcdn.com%2Fpublic%2Fcovers-large%2F135596-mortal-protection-services-sci-fi-comedy.jpg%3Ftime%3D1785907867&w=640&q=75)
by B.T.Skull
The Earth wakes up to find itself surrounded by completely different stars. An announcement rings out across the planet: "We at Mortal Protection Services have relocated you to a foster system temporarily. Do not panic." . . Some of you are panicking, when we specifically asked you not to. What to expect: Sci-fi: Various densities, mostly soft. We got your warp drives and subspace enfuckulators, but also a touch of hard space reality. Who doesn't love a chewy candy with a hard shell? Comedy: From slapstick to erudite to troglodyte. We got stuff for any brow level you want. As well as many, many easter-eggs for sci-fi & fantasy nerds alike. Galactic horror: I'll leave the fully fleshy nature of that for you to discover a few chapters in, it's better that way. Fun with Letters: Silly little anagrams, and silly little acronyms. A Hyperspace Cat. (You may have seen her in an ad that sent you here) Find the paper back here! If you don't like reading with your eyes, you could do it with your ears, on Audible! Not Stubbing, until I get a TV deal if I can help it. Please enjoy the whole thing. (Proudly made by humans. No AI in Writing, Narration, or Art. Cover by Instagram user: pedro_serpa_75)
| # | Title | Words |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | I.PP: Planet Pilfering | 0 |
| 2 | II.VYF: Vote Your Fate | 0 |
| 3 | III.A: Abstainer | 0 |
| 4 | III.1: Terra | 0 |
| 5 | III.2: Gaia | 0 |
| 6 |
| III.3: Earth |
| 0 |
| 7 | IV.S: S̸͔̳̓͋c̷̨̈́͋͝o̵̙̩̲̾̓ṷ̷̜͛̐ͅr̴̼̣̉g̷̰̭̞̒͊͘ę̷̛͈͕̾̈́ | 0 |
| 8 | IV.A: Abstainer | 0 |
| 9 | IV.T: The Terran | 0 |
| 10 | IV.G: The Gaian | 0 |
| 11 | IV.E: The 'Earthling' | 0 |
| 12 | V: The Audit | 0 |
| 13 | V.J: I Jim | 0 |
| 14 | V.DB: Dilt Bifferent | 0 |
| 15 | V.OS: Origin of Scourge | 0 |
| 16 | V.JJ: Jimmi Jimsonson | 0 |
| 17 | V.IM-A: Ingamar Ma-ana | 0 |
| 18 | VI.A: Abstainer | 0 |
| 19 | VI.OBB: Operation Bob Bomb | 0 |
| 20 | VI.MM: Meeting of Minds | 0 |
| 21 | VII.OoJ: Order of Jimoleans | 0 |
| 22 | VII.PCS: Portal Central Station | 0 |
| 23 | VII.PDEA: Picard and Dathon at El-Adrel | 0 |
| 24 | VII.TP: Third Place | 0 |
| 25 | VII.FM: Family Meal | 0 |
| 26 | VII.A: Abstainer | 0 |
| 27 | VIII.A: Abstainer | 0 |
| 28 | VIII.S: S̸͔̳̓͋c̷̨̈́͋͝o̵̙̩̲̾̓ṷ̷̜͛̐ͅr̴̼̣̉g̷̰̭̞̒͊͘ę̷̛͈͕̾̈́ | 0 |
| 29 | VIII.CS: The CSS SAMWISE | 0 |
| 30 | VIII.IS: Ingamar's Ship | 0 |
| 31 | VIII.FE : The Flying Euphemism | 0 |
| 32 | IX.CEV: Cat's Eye View | 0 |
| 33 | IX.IFUD: It's Fair Use, Disney | 0 |
| 34 | IX.JAMES: J.A.M.E.S. | 0 |
| 35 | IX.BA: Bifferent Autopsy | 0 |
| 36 | X.J: James | 0 |
| 37 | X.RR: ♪ We're no strangers to love ♫ | 0 |
| 38 | X.GFL: Grounded For Life | 0 |
| 39 | X.ASWO : A Spaceship With Oars | 0 |
| 40 | X.DB: Displayed in Bronze | 0 |
| 41 | XI.TPWM : The Problem With Marta | 0 |
| 42 | XI.JG: Jimmi's Gamble | 0 |
| 43 | XI.TCB: The Calm Before | 0 |
| 44 | XI.TSMBS: The Storm Maiden's Battle Shanty | 0 |
| 45 | XI.WTC: What's a targeting computer? | 0 |
| 46 | XI.SI: Sudden, but Inevitable | 0 |
| 47 | XII.A: Abstainer | 0 |
| 48 | XII.STA: S̸͔̳̓͋c̷̨̈́͋͝o̵̙̩̲̾̓ṷ̷̜͛̐ͅr̴̼̣̉g̷̰̭̞̒͊͘ę̷̛͈͕̾̈́ Tummy Ache | 0 |
| 49 | XII.TD: The Diltipositor | 0 |
| 50 | XII.DB: Dilt Bifferenter | 0 |
| 51 | XII.DBC: Dilt Biff City | 0 |
| 52 | XIII.DOB: Diltopia Or Bust | 0 |
| 53 | Epilogue | 0 |
| 54 | Paperback Announcement | 0 |
| 55 | Audiobook Now Available! (Also sneak peek bonus chapter) | 0 |
